April 6, 2007

“He appears to be deep in shallow relationships.” 

Few things, if anything, are more important than the relationships we develop and nurture.  In most cases, long-lasting business arrangements are only as effective as the interpersonal relationships that develop during the evolution of the deal.

Recently, a good friend and colleague told a group of us that his wife was planning to retire from a long and productive career as a teacher.  He shared his reaction when she informed him that she might like to teach prisoners to read.  “Honey,” he said, “That sounds a bit risky to me.”

“Oh, don’t worry, I’ll be safe,” his wife replied.

With a wry grin, our friend stunned his wife as he said, “It isn’t your safety I was worried about.  I just don’t want you falling in love with any of those guys.”

Relationships can be formed at all levels.  More important than the level at which the relationship is formed is the depth of the relationship.  On one occasion, Joe Freburger, my partner at CJ2, and I were invited by a sales person to attend a discussion with one of his clients.  The sales person seemed to know his way around this customer location quite well.  He knew the security guard’s name.  Several people nodded or greeted him as we walked through the halls to our scheduled appointment.  The administrator who had scheduled the session addressed him warmly when we arrived. 

His moment of truth arrived as the meeting began.  After the usual courteous exchange of pleasantries, it quickly became apparent that our sales person didn’t know the needs of the customer or the real purpose of the meeting.  He wasn’t prepared to answer any of the questions that he should have known were coming his way.  While it was a friendly session, we didn’t make any traction toward winning additional business.

I left the meeting greatly disappointed that this individual didn’t seem to know his customer and remarked as such to Joe as we headed back to the airport.  Joe’s evaluation of the sales person summed it up:  “He appears to be deep in shallow relationships.”

Successful relationships take time.  They require investment.  Successful investments offer great rewards.